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adservers. hunh.

I know, it's been awhile. Fuck you.

So I bene on this kick of looking at "magazines for men" websites for the past couple of days. You know, Maxim and Stuff. Magazines that are trying to be the "Playboy of the New Millennium" without having the sack to post boobies on the pages.

Yeah, the writing is trying to be aimed at the young male and his attitude and be all cool and stuff but they just aren't entertaining enough to plunk five bones down on, that's for sure.

They don't even come with a friggin CDROM-o-goodies, for chrissake.

This isn't what I came back to talk about.

So I find a link to and it isn't too bad a site if you're a big guy dork like me, and I find another link to something that interested me, but not enough to actually remember...

I click it, and get this:

Oh Bother!

Wouldn't you know it, our ad server has gone
and blown another vacuum tube. Please be
patient as we administer first aid and figure out
what the devil has happened. Thank you.


(However you can contact our surgeons at

so I send them a little gem...

Subject: ad problem...
Date: Tue, 04 Jul 2000 21:49:11 -0700
From: SlappyJack

Well, yeah, see, this is why ad servers FUCKING SUCK ASS.

Companies that make money off of demographics are to the internet
age what junk bond traders were to the eighties.


I hope I see you ad guys on the street in my neighborhood so i
can fucking spit on you.



Now that I think of it, It's July Fourth, and they DO have their right to their free speech and to make money any way they want.

But I'll guarantee my Grandfather (and yours, and yours, and yours...) didn't take grenade fragments in his knee in some tiny french town to fight for the freedom to dem every fucker that comes through your site and then compile it with bought lists to figure out that my cookie ID goes with this physical address, so we should send him more junkmail about porn.

He did it so I could tell weasels like them:

Kiss My Unwiped Ass, you Demming Slimy Weasel Mother-Fuckers.

Thanks, Bob. Happy Fourth of July.

Slap Out.

4 July 00

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