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It's all a lot of simple tricks and nonsense.
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so i dont update.
blow me.

hey kids... I got a few folks lookin at this to see my PHP "skillz", so a little message for them...

CRUSH ME, BABY!

Since I never update anymore, i figure I should put something up here, so a few random thoughts...


I'm sure you've all read my wife's Beefy Boy update this week, 'cause the only readers I get these days are her friends, and here's my side of it...

Saturday Night Flim-O-Rama:

I found the whole thing at the ATA far too disturbing to write about at first, but now that I've had a few to think back and ponder it...

~ ART FUCK is far too nice a term for it. ArT FuCk is what they'd be asking up to put up if they knew we were talking about it.
~ The proper term should more like be Pretentious Unrehearsed Masturbation
~ A theatre featuring "lost footage" dead art styles is a good idea.
~ A theatre featuring bad "lost footage" dead art styles is a bad idea.
~ If you're going to show 16mm film in a 35mm filmstrip projector and then do funky things with it to bad music, fine. If you're going to do it in the name of art and then NOT BOTHER TO REHEARSE, we have a problem.
~ A title like Safety through Death, Part 2 is neither witty nor artsy. It is, however, a sign that you should stop ingesting whatever it is you're ingesting.
~ No matter how quirky and funny the idea seems, a 24 minute scratchy film of bad singers and worse filmmaking about Hobos does not have any kitch value.
~ In fact, it has no value.
~ In fact, the people responsible for it should be beaten with sticks.
~ "Going East?" is not a good refrain.
~ I have never suggested Robocop as a video rental (not that it doesn't ROCK).
~ Plato's Symposium - on a filmstrip? Five Dollars.
~ Seeing my Brother in Law doing weird things in said filmstrip while scantily clad? Five Dollars.
~ Sharing this moment with the people he grew up with? Priceless.
~ The ATA specializes in Dead Media. Why do they have a website?


Those fuckers at the webbies forgot me again.

Typical.

How could one not love the bastion of good taste and common sense that is slappyjack.com? Hunh? How? HOW??? ANSWER ME, YOU PRETENTIOUS FUCKERS!!!

That fucking Turkish "I Kiss You" guy gets a nomination, and I don't.
That fucking Turkish "I Kiss You" guy gets a nomination, and Filthy don't.
That fucking Turkish "I Kiss You" guy gets a nomination, and bill don't.
That fucking Turkish "I Kiss You" guy gets a nomination, and word.com don't.

Typical.

Maybe If I fill the page up with a lot of oversized dorky images of myself they'll pick me next year. It's not like he spells any better than i do, that I could at least understand...

Be sure to check it out. Some of the sites are pretty good. Most of them are nothing but big corporate commercials, but some of them are pretty good.


I am one step closer "kept man" status, thank you very much.

Wifey got some new title that gives her extra cash in spite of the fact that she's nothing more that a suit what knows basic HTML.

Typical.

Maybe I should learn to say things like "market share" and "target demographic" and learn to use bloated middleware to run a website and I can make the big coin, too.

nah.

I'll just learn to cook and tend to the young'uns.


ELECTION 2000

Presidentially, we're once again fucked.

For those that don't know, Gay People STILL can't get married in california.

Typical.

The option to vote for "None of the Above" didn't pass, either. Damn.


Work: Some days you just gotta let go.


Slap Out.

14 Mar 00

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