Goddamnit, I'd piss on a spark plug if I thought it'd do any good!
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Indiana Jones and The scraping of the bottom of the Monry Making Barrel

I told my girlfriend that I'd go see Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull with her, despite a complete lack of interest. Theres a movie theatre on the strip thats about 100 yards from the back entrance of the theatre.

about 20 people from the show went after work.

It was stupid. Not just Bad, but bad and STUPID.

If you remember how I described "The Perfect Storm" as "two hours of watching fishermen geting flogged with water"; Crystal Skull is 90 minutes of watching an old guy run from one stupid near-death experience to another while putting together immediately solved clues.

Non-Specific Example:

[ puzzle/problem presents itself ]

Not-Indy: "GREAT! What Do we Do NOW!???!"

Indy: "I know what this is, its an aincent blah blah blah. Noone speaks the language/ its so aincent noone knows what it means/ its obvious I should put X into opening Y."
[ 15-20 seconds of explanatory babble]

[ They do what indy says, then imdeiately ]


[ 4 minutes of digitized special effects later ... ]

Not-Indy: "GREAT! What Do we Do NOW!???!"

Indy: "I know what this is, .... "

[ every other near-death happening involves also getting chased by commie soviets]

The last ten minutes are the feel good ending that you paid your ten bucks for, then you sit throught the closing credits to see if theres any "oh-so-secrert scene" that popular in films today.

Don't bother. There isn't one.

Just because the effects were well done doesn't mean it isn't Stupid and Awful.

The only good part is that I did manage to nap for about 10 minutes where I mimssed absolutely nothing vital to the plot. This ten minute nap managed to revitalize me enough for some activity at 2.30 in the morning after the movie.

That wasn't awful.

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